I just love when you know you are hearing God...when it all feels so right.
I prayed that I would be able to find the words and when I found the words that I would have the strength to speak them and then when it was all done that I would find some peace in what I did. ::Deep Breath:: I quit being a Brownie leader last night. It's done and I really have no regrets. That is how I know that I am following the path that God laid out before me. I am making bigger margins in my life.
So I handed over the checkbook, the achievements book detailing everything about the girls, any supplies I had and said I would stay as a leader in paper only until the other lady got approved. I even suggested they find some place else to meet. We are meeting at my church and I have the keys and I just don't want to be stuck waiting around for everyone to leave so I can lock up. I am really done, I can feel it in my heart.
I did have a bit of a panic attack last night about it though. Before I told the other leaders about me quitting we were planning out the next 6 months schedule. We decided to take the girls on a camping trip with the rest of our unit which is very large, I bet there will be close to 100 girls camping. It is 2 nights and parents are not allowed. Only leaders and scouts. Um.... I realized later last night... I am not a leader anymore. I will have to send Courtney to these things and I can't go. The thought still doesn't sit well with me. A friend of mine talked me down a bit last night, she is a leader in Canada and made me feel better about not sending her at all. She is 6, too young to go 2 nights without me. Well Courtney would probably do great, mom... dad... not so great. Okay, starting to panic again. I need to remember that I do have so much peace about this decision and this panic is about Courtney camping, not me quitting.
Now I pray that when I tell Courtney she will be able to have the same peace. I should have talked to her about it before the meeting. ACK! Okay, did I just say that I had complete peace about this decision.
3 days ago
1 comment:
Hi there-
thanks for stopping by my blog!
Glad you were able to do what you knew you needed to do! It's always the anticipation of something that is hard - one its' done, its a relief!
BTW, I always have a hard time when parents are "not allowed" on trips with young kids. That never sits well with me, so I'm with you on the camping trip thing. Remember, she is YOUR child and you can decide anything you want! Dont feel guilty for whatever you think is right for you. I've noticed that with my son, I torment over things like that, but once I make a decision and say it, he gets over it quick.
Take Care!
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