He put plastic in the bed of his pick up and filled it up with water so the kids could have a pool. I find his childishness exhausting most of the time, but then I saw how excited the kids were, it was 100* today, or nearly anyway. The dogs even seemed to love it because the plastic didn't hold and I found them under the truck where the water was dripping out. I guess the whole thing made me giggle. I do want my kids to grow up with manners and all that good stuff, I am a city girl, raised with the "good things in life" and he grew up on a farm in a town of 200 people. Now after almost 17 years of marriage I find myself longing for that lifestyle.... but not in the city. LOL I don't know, I am so back and forth about it really. I think we have figured out that this is where God wants us.
Oh, so back to ... wanting the kids to grow up with manners. No matter how hard I try it is a fighting battle because my husband is crude and rude, though a strong Christian... yep I scratch my head at that one too, he is more friends with my oldest than anything. He lets him watch TV shows that I think he is too young for, uses bad language around him, burps, farts, the whole thing. I have been so grumpy lately because I want my kids to have good manners and I can't compete with a fun dad. HELP. Any ideas? Not to be putting John down at all. He is a great dad, he does parent as well, the kids respect him completely and I have to give him kudos because he came up with some parenting ideas that I think they will respond to way better than my nagging.
This is one of those things that I continually pray about and find the right time and words to talk to John about. But really anything he doesn't want to change he won't even if he knows he should. I feel kind of defeated. I am in an up and down place right now. Happy, frustrated, tired....
6 comments:
I think if he is a strong Christian, God will use him just as he is. You can still be in there with the more delicate lessons in manners, but the fun side of your husband will be his characteristic. The children will remember you both for the way you bring your personalities into the family. If your children feel loved by your husband and see him loving God, then that is a good start. Sorry if that is not helpful.... easy for me to sprout these words from across the ocean...
I don't think the construction industry makes it easy to avoid foul language that's for sure. Brian is usually pretty good about not being that way at home, but man is their industry a dark place!!
I really like what hill upon a hill said in her first sentence! So encouraging that God will use all of us if we continue to look toHim :o)
I had to laugh as I read your post - you are pretty much descrbing my hubby (foul mouth, farting, burping, etc). When I grew up, it was only my sister and me, so things were pretty girly. Now I have a husband and two boys - very different from MY childhood! I have to say, I get frustrated and annoyed at the things that I feel should be different about my hubby, but I know that when push comes to shove, he is one of the most Godly people I know. The cussing and all that is very "surface". What really matters is how he feels about God. I have seen people who "behave" properly, but then when push comes to shove are quite selfish and ungodly. So what can I say - I guess we just gotta love them as is! They might be a bit rough on the surface, but what matters is what's way deep down! Thanks for your great post (and I love the photo!)
Absolutely agree with the other commenters :)
Thanks for dropping by my blog and yes, my husband is stationed in AZ :)
Hugs,
Sandra
That looks like great fun. It was lovely of your DH to think of something the kids would love and do that for them :-) It sounds like he is a great Dad!
Sometimes I think we just have to learn to put up with a bit of blokey stuff if we live with them... lol
I think the only real problem would be foul language, but then again, to him it might not mean the same as what it does to you iykwim? It might just be nothing to him. I guess it's what is in the heart that matters :-)
I would just continue to pray about it. Do you read the bible together at all or have a family devotion time?
If you do, you could choose sections for him to read aloud to the family which include verses such as:
"Put away perversity from your mouth; keep corrupt talk far from your lips" (Pr. 4:24)
"Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen (Eph. 4:31)"
That way the whole family might think about it and the kids could develop their own convictions on the matter while at the same time reminding him?
Just a thought :-)
Ruth xx
Funny funny post....sounds a lot like my hubby too.I can definately relate to what your saying. Mine is a Christian as well and I know that God is dealing with him in His time such as he doesn't cuss anymore. God's word says, "that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus."
God bless you....
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